speak

tell me what we're even trying to do
because my second guesses never seem
better than the first ones
and i'm running out of things to tell myself
in the middle of the night
when i wake up and wonder about you

forgive me

i'm trying to remember
what it's like to
miss you

but can't

swinging on a string

what if everything i told you
was a lie
and when i said goodbye
i really meant
try to forget me

would you re-trace glances
stolen from street signs
and invisible lines drawn
between and through eyes

how many times can we start and stop
only to start and stop again

made my bed but it doesn't mean
i can get comfortable

want you around but will still push you away
what can i say
i never said i play fair

you only thought you heard me

w h i s p e r

i think i've given up on you
your glue doesn't stick
to the inside layers
of paper thin walls that hide
answers chiseled in stone
ribs that conceal heart(s)
that are made to mismatch my own

thrown away old scraps of you
but kept the tangled web of memories
retrace my steps to find a stone overturned

left you a mixed message
and tucked it in a blue bottle
to become one with the sea

it sailed away
an attempted suicide
to which i complied
i thought it best
for you and i

left you with a piece of me
tucked in your back pocket

still waiting for a refund

can't seem to clear my head
with you resting inside
begging for a little more attention
and another synthesized love story

you're ruining a barely existent
life of love i'd like to think i have
if you'd just let me

running laps of hunger driven
wordless mystery around me
keeping me in the darkness of dusk

i wish you'd just make up your mind
so i could decide what to do
after you